The one food New Yorkers love to debate almost as much as pizza is the bagel. The conversation surrounding these two essential food groups are very different though.
For pizza, the debate is centered on location. Do you prefer Lucali or do you prefer Di Fara? There is less debate about cheese vs. pepperoni or wood oven vs brick oven. These are important factors, but your taste as a pizza eater is judged by where you eat as opposed to what you eat.
For bagels, how you eat your bagel is essential. We have seen campaigns squashed and reputations destroyed from our top political offices solely based on bagel preference. Seriously, cinnamon raisin + lox or toasted wheat + cream cheese? Have you no taste buds?
Per a reader request (always taking requests for future topics at 2xParked@gmail.com), 2xParked is investigating our boiled friend with a hole in the center.
Lost Angeles
A new bagel controversy arose due to this article from the NY Times.
Before I respond with something I might regret, I have to remember, I am a data person. The data will answer this existential crisis of ours. Although the article is more about the bagel innovations in California, the headline makes a bold claim (Cali bagels are better than NYC bagels). As offended as us New Yorkers might feel about this headline, perhaps our perception of bagels are as stale as a 7pm pickup. Perhaps we fell asleep at the wheel, and others have taken our bagel crown.
Whether you look at it from a quantity perspective (number of venues with “bagel” density) or quality perspective (rankings of first two pages on Yelp for “top bagels”), New York City bagels are still number one. Additionally, no one in New York would go to a place called “Jim’s LA Bagels” or “Martha’s Bay Area Bagels”, yet everyone on the West Coast wants a New York bagel. Another point in the win column.
Bagels reign supreme in New York City. Sorry California, and I see you looking down on us, Montreal. You are next.
Bagel Architecture
With the release of Godzilla vs. Kong, two titans who have destroyed NYC at some point in their biographies, I decided to take a bagel perspective.
Both Godzilla and King Kong have used some of our great architecture. Godzilla used Madison Square Garden as a nest for her eggs in 1998, while King Kong decided to cut the line to the top of the Empire State Building in 1933.
These are two of the most iconic buildings in New York City. Would Godzilla or Kong be happier if instead of buildings they were bagel structures? How many bagels would it take to reconstruct those buildings? I decided to find out. (Answer: a lot).
Best of the Best
We have already established that NYC has the best bagels. Using a similar methodology I did with pizza, I decided to rank the best bagel places in the city. This was no easy feat. I used over 20 different “best of” lists, which listed out 64 places to get bagels. Here are the top 15 bagel locales in NYC:
MayorModel
At least our current group of candidates have learned from the de Blasio bagel-gate. According to this article from Forward.com, the bagel choices of our candidates seem normal. Kathryn Garcia even chooses our #7 ranked bagel.
People seem surprised that more moderate candidates, like Yang and Adams, are leading polls over progressive candidates.
There is more to voting than policy. We see that character is more indicative of representation than policy.
NYC might not be as progressive as the people we surround ourselves. 1/3 of NYC Dems voted for Nixon in the 2018 governor election. 1/3 of NYC Dems voted for Bernie in the 2016 presidential primary. 1/3 of NYC Dems voted for Jumaane Williams in the 2019 special election. Although that number has likely increased and there are some pockets with > 1/2, you have to consider NYC as a whole, not just parts of Manhattan and Brooklyn.
"Bagel Time" was drawn by Ink&thyme, drawing life's unforgettable moments. For unique art drawn just for you, check them out on Facebook and on Instagram.
To subscribe to future newsletters, click here.
For more content, follow 2xParked on Twitter @2xParked.
Comments? Suggestions? Questions? Email me at 2xParked@gmail.com.